Transgender or NOT transgender II

It took me a while to recover from my dogma of lesbianism. Don't get me wrong (and don't pull my Lesbo card and keep me from Olivia trips!) but I leaned that there was more to me than loving other women and feminism. 

I learned from a very wise trans-woman about the difference between gender identity and sexual preference.  As recently as 2003, I, who was in the community, ignorantly believed that people who transitioned (to the opposite gender) primarily did so as a means to not just be who they feel that they are, but to be in a traditional opposite sex relationship. How could I be so naive? My friend went from being a heterosexual male, to a lesbian woman. That means, that her gender changed (from M to F), but her sexual preference did not (sexually and romantically attracted to women). Maybe I didn't understand the situations of others; I only knew that I was not fully female, and I wanted to be with women, so my gender was the issue, and my sexual preference was not. So why wouldn't I just transition to the male gender? 

When my friend suggested that I may be transgender I cringed! 

I was shocked to think that I might once again be limited to a single, defined, mono-gender. 

It took many months, and some unexpected confusion, before I confirmed that I didn't want to be either male or female.